My Needs Count

I spent years covering up my partner’s sexual acting out and protecting him. Even though I experienced severe emotional pain over his affairs, fear of disease due to his involvement with prostitutes, anger over money spent on pornography and telephone calls, and shame over his arrests, I was afraid to get help for myself because of what people would think about my husband. But I’m learning that my needs count! I’m learning to find safe places where I can share my problems and the program. As a recovering S-Anon member, I often cannot avoid mentioning, in general terms, something about my husband’s problem, but there is no need to go into detail. In S-Anon, we learn to place the focus on ourselves and our own recovery, and that’s what I share with others.

Reprinted from Working the S-Anon Program, 2nd Edition, page 96.