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Sexaholism has affected us deeply whether the sexaholic in our lives was a marriage partner, significant other, parent, sibling, or another family member. Perhaps the sexaholic was a good friend, teacher, or boss. It also seems true that whenever and however sexaholism has invaded our lives, it has caused our interactions with others to become more complicated and confused.
Often we have found it difficult to see how someone else’s sexual attitudes and behavior could impact us so much. We may have wondered why we should need help when the other person has the problem with sexual lust. It may have been difficult for us to admit that sexual addiction is possible and that it is a progressive disease much like alcoholism. We may have come to S-Anon to find relief from the pain. As our awareness has grown, and as we have begun using the tools of the S-Anon program, we have found strength and hope to move forward in our lives. We can choose recovery whether or not the sexaholic does.
We cannot know for sure that our relationship with the sexaholic will ever be what we might have wished for, but we do know that we can learn to trust a Higher Power and the process of recovery. We are assured that there is no unhappiness too great to be lessened. In S-Anon, we learn that we need to concentrate on our own recovery. We learn to keep the focus on ourselves and trust that a Higher Power will guide us through the challenges in our relationships.
Reprinted from Working the S-Anon Program, 2nd Edition, page 59.